Randy

 Today Randy died.

Randy was 81 years old, married and a huge pain in my butt the last five years of his life.  But I liked him.  

I met Randy when my (Now) ex brother in law got engaged to his wife.  Randy was her step father.  A HUGE improvement over sperm donor.  He was always going with the flow.  I don't think time was really something he paid attention too.

I had seen him sit through dinners with some huge drama going on, and he would be eating away enjoying his meal.  Then looked shocked that something happened at the dinner table.

He had a horrible family, so he kind of spoiled his step daughter.  When her wedding was planned and we had to do some shopping, he would call out "Spend lots of money!" and his "girls" would do just that.  He really didn't care.

His wife Joan was from England, and she just would take care of EVERYTHING for him, but he adored her, and I think she knew it.  She didn't act a lot like she did, but she would stop anything that she thought Randy would hate.  Unlike when she had been married the first time.

I knew about four years ago that Randy was starting to have a small sense of dementia when he got let go from Wal-Mart and knew if he didn't find a new job he and Joan would be homeless.  

HUH?

Their house was paid off, the cars paid off...four checks would filter in to the house every month, so I had NO idea where that came from.  I did try to help, but it was no shock to anyone when he didn't get a job...except to him.

For the last month and a half both he and his wife Joan have been in hospice, his daughter and I have known he wouldn't make Christmas, but it still hurts to know he is gone from this earth.  

I feel guilty for having to tell him and Joan "no" because they needed more help than I could give, and had to stop helping at all because they would not let anyone but me or their daughter help.  Frankly what they had wanted was either me to help them, and complain how horrible their daughter was for not coming from Germany to take care of them.  Or have her come down and work, and then STILL bitch to me about her. 

Enough was enough.  

I have to admit, I am ticked off that neither Joan or Randy would let us come in to clean, or have help do anything.  I think both of them would have lived longer, and better lives.  But it's too late now.

Because Randy died today.